So today was the day. You know, the one where utter exhaustion and frustration sets in? Yeah, that’s the one. I could use a drink so bad right now… We get to have invited guests tomorrow morning for our 10:30 AM run through, so somehow, I think that is why we felt a rush of having to have everything perfect. We were still getting choreography changes, and we had to learn how to wear skirts in the opening tap number. What? It’s just so difficult, because critiques are being shouted out, your entire body is aching and you just have to keep pushing harder and harder. And just when you think you’ve gotten something right, it’s wrong. And not just a little, a lot. And how’s come the women have to keep wearing character heels and the men can wear street sneakers? I came back to the apartment looking as though I’d just gone swimming, that’s how terribly I was sweating. Climbing the steps out of the subway, I nearly wiped out – just couldn’t lift my legs high enough to climb the stairs my thighs hurt so badly. I love shoes (especially heels), but honestly – if I don’t have to wear another pair in my life, I’d be fine with that. My favorite critique (do you detect a little sarcasm?) is the one that we need to just dance and not be so stiff and rigid. Um, okay… number one, I’m trying… number two, how is that possible with all of these details that we’ve been given… and number three, I had to throw any natural instincts out the window when I arrived in NY just to blend into the ensemble. Whoever thinks that being in the ensemble isn’t important (you know, the people that say, “I’m JUST in the ensemble.”) should definitely reconsider. I think it’s WAY harder than being the lead. Let me follow that up with an explanation so that I don’t get hate mail: ensemble members have to worry about uniformity all of the time. You have to look like your neighbor, except when you’re not supposed to look like your neighbor, and you have to remember numbers so that spacing is never off and you have to remember these huge dance numbers that make the leads look amazing. As a lead, you have to look like your character, which is pretty much a choice depending on what you and the director think. You have more freedom in movements, because it’s your “character.” If you are standing in the wrong place, don’t worry – the ensemble will guide off of you to make you look right. Oh, and sometimes you don’t even have to finish the dance numbers – you just flap off after you sing the solo at the top and then flap back on for the ending (maybe). I don’t know; kudos to those in the ensemble. I’ve done both, and it just goes to prove what I’ve always felt, especially in a dance show, it’s a team effort. Yes, as a lead there are lines and solos to sing, so there is a lot of material that goes into creating characters; however, it is my line and I don’t have to blend chorally with all of the other females – remember character choice? You know, it’s all good. I’ve done both, and the simple point I’m trying to make – ensembles don’t always get the recognition they deserve, so hats off to the ensemble! So in my effort to try and feel a little better, I’m thinking about ending my private pity party and maybe going to the grocery for some fruit. It sounds pretty good right now, and is no doubt healthier than the drink I REALLY want right now. Being alone in NY (or anywhere for that matter) pretty much sucks when you’re having a hard day. Oh, good news though (have you detected that sarcasm again?) – we get to wear full costumes, mics, wigs, etc. for all 7 days of our 10 out of 12 hour long days of tech. I just can’t wait (insert grumbles here). And my sad story for the day – who doesn’t need one – I was talking to this guy with his dog while I was waiting to catch the elevator down this morning. His dog was so sweet (I actually got to pet him). Anyway, he told me that he lost his other dog on Monday to cancer. And the strangest thing – I remember seeing this man with two dogs earlier in my stay here in NY. My heart just went out to them. He said that his dog that is left has been lost without his friend. It just made me miss Sophie and Sam so much. Sophie and Sam are like my kids, and they have become such a part of my family. I just don’t know what Aaron and I would do if something happened to one of them (or what the other would do alone). So on that note, I hope you had a great day today. We have one more rehearsal in NY tomorrow and then we leave for Detroit on Saturday. It’s kind of bittersweet. What am I looking forward to the most? Not slipping and sliding all over the dance floor. It’s the little things in life.
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